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#023: Tips for Engagement, Wedding, and 1st Year of Marriage - Part 1 | Brigid Pontarelli
Getting engaged and married is exciting! But it can also be overwhelming, especially if you come from a broken home. Joey and his wife, Brigid, share their story and what they wish someone told them about engagement, the wedding, and the first year of marriage.
Abuse, Addiction, and How I've Found Healing from my Parents' Divorce
On the night before my dad left, I was very scared, felt very alone, and felt like life was ending. When I watched him walk away the next day, it felt like he had cut out part of my heart and taken it with him and like I would never be whole again, and it still feels that way in some ways.
I Became My Mother's Counselor After the Divorce
When I was a little girl, I remember feeling the need to take responsibility for my mom's emotional wellbeing. Taking ownership, I became like a counselor, listening and comforting her.
What I Wish I Had Known About My Parents’ Divorce
What has occurred as a result of this breakdown in the family, is that we are terrified of making a promise that could later on be broken. What we have learned is that a vow doesn’t mean anything, it is unsafe. I can say ‘I love you’ and still walk away. Marriage, therefore, has lost its place in society as an outdated and ineffective tradition.
We treat relationships lightly and avoid getting attached at all costs.
It’s up to us to undo the cycle of broken promises and give the generations after us the opportunity to learn what it means to love and to love others themselves.
All Children of Divorce Deserve a Voice
Easier said than done, but it is critical for children of divorce to learn how to self-advocate. For a 7-year-old, this may look like having the courage for both parents to attend his/her birthday party without fighting. For a teen or young adult, that may be the insistence on not having to attend multiple Christmases at each of your parents' families.
#022: A Quick and Simple Healing Exercise
If you could go back in time and have a conversation with the younger version of you, what would you say?
So often, those of us from broken homes are never asked how we feel about it all. Nobody asks how it has affected us. Never having a chance to speak, we bottle it up inside.
#021: How to Build Love That Lasts: The 5 Love Languages
Most couples feel their love disappears at some point. They long for love that lasts, but they doubt it is possible. And even if it were, they don't know how to build it.
The 5 Love Languages are a simple and effective tool for building real love. They're so simple, they're often overlooked.
My Kind of Broken
I think there’s this subconscious myth out there that in order for us single people to meet someone and have it work out, we are required to have it all together.
Emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, and physically we have to be ‘good enough’.
Until then we are vastly insufficient, which is why Mr. Wonderful is nowhere to be found.
#020: Navigating Singleness | Sarah Swafford
Navigating the single years can be challenging and lonely. In this episode, we hit on some of the unique struggles we face during a season of singleness. Our guest, Sarah Swafford, offers advice on dealing with those struggles as well as guidance on how to prepare for the love we all long for.
Something Has Been Taken From Me
I did not think it affected me. I thought it was better. Both of my parents seemed happier. I went down a path of self destruction in college. For two years I spent almost every night intoxicated in some way. I was very promiscuous and detached any intimacy or real love from my friendships and relationships. So many wounds in my sexuality were caused then.
#019: How to Find Your Soulmate Without Losing Your Soul | Jason Evert
Ladies, if you've ever felt discouraged and alone in your search for love, this episode is for you. Jason Evert offers advice from the book he and his wife wrote titled How to Find Your Soulmate Without Losing Your Soul.
#018: The Dating Blueprint: What Women Want But Won't Tell Men | Jason Evert
Men are rarely given advice on how to pursue a woman. In fact, they're usually just told what not to do. In this episode, author and speaker Jason Evert gives practical advice based on his new book The Dating Blueprint.
#017: 6 Tips to Conquer Your Fear of Love
I felt torn. On one hand, I craved love. On the other, I feared it. Why? Because I didn’t think love could last. I feared my relationship would end the way my parents’ marriage did. Thankfully, that fear no longer controls me.
What the Beast Teaches Us About Our Wounds
The Beast could have locked himself away forever and sent Belle home because of fear of rejection…fear that the underlying belief that he was unlovable was true. But he didn’t; and I think (even though it is a fairy tale…I do know that) we should learn from this. Most people won’t leave life unscathed, and while painful, we can use this to build an even stronger world by striving for and being the light. In a way, we have a responsibility to others to avoid putting them through whatever we have been through. If we don’t use our hurt for good then it’s just hurt. If we use it to help ourselves and others it becomes redemption.
#016: Everyone Acted Like My Parents’ Separation Wasn’t a Big Deal | Erin Hasso
Erin’s parents separated after a big fight when she was 16. It was really painful for her. However, everyone acted like it wasn’t a big deal. And so, she felt like something was wrong with her for feeling so hurt.
Why ‘I Do’ is Bigger Than You
Love is meant to be eternal…not just to last as long as it feels good. The family unit depends on this. The security that comes from a couple that stays together provides their children with the opportunity to learn what it means to love and be loved. Love entails permanency; anything less is insufficient and breaks the most essential player in loving relationships: trust.
Why Wasn't I Able to Have a Normal Family?
It has caused me to have an absolute terror of intimacy with both friendships and especially anything romantic. I distrust most people and tend to believe everyone has a secret intention to manipulate me or hurt me in some way.
#015: Navy SEAL: Calm is Contagious | Mike Sarraille
Who knows the most about staying calm during chaotic situations? A combat experienced Navy SEAL.
In this episode, you'll get the advice of Navy SEAL Mike Sarraille on staying calm during a crisis like the Coronavirus.
#014: Psychologist: How to Handle Fear and Anxiety During a Crisis (Like the Coronavirus) | Dr. Julia Sadusky, PsyD
The Coronavirus is causing a lot of panic. There's so much fear, anxiety, and uncertainty going around. So, how do we deal with all of that during a crisis? Dr. Julia Sadusky shows us how.
#013: Why We Repeat Our Parents' Mistakes and How to Avoid It | Dr. Julia Sadusky, PsyD
Most of us with separated or divorced parents are afraid of getting divorced or repeating our parents’ mistakes. We want to avoid the bad behavior we saw in our families and our parents’ marriages, but we don’t know how to do that.
If you can relate, listen to this episode.