How It’s Not Your Fault Has Helped People

“I bought this for someone very close to me who was going through their parents divorce as a young adult. It really really helped him and was a major turning point in his healing journey. Highly recommend. I’m so glad this is a resource.”

Allison

“As one who researches the effects of divorce on children (I edited Primal Loss: The Now-Adult Children of Divorce Speak), I am beyond excited that there is finally a book that comes to the aid of the adult children of divorce--without gaslighting them. There is almost nothing out there addressing the real pain and obstacles that come after one's natural foundation is shattered via parental divorce. The culture of "do what makes you happy!" can deny the dark effects of divorce all it wants, but for the child who has gone through the crucible, the suffering is real and long-lasting. This book is a lifeline, giving practical advice on a broad range of issues, with no condescension. Written by Joey Pontarelli, himself a child of divorce, and the founder of Restored, you will feel like you are getting sound advice from a friend who knows you. Highly, highly recommend for any teen or adult child of divorce. (Would be great for therapists and pastors to have on their shelves to hand out, as well.)“

Leila Miller, Author

“Your ministry has literally saved my life. Your podcast has been more effective than 30 years of counseling. Nothing worked until I found Restored. Finally, people who understood how I felt and gave this pain a voice.”

Holli

“This book is an essential resource for people of faith seeking to make sense of the aftermath of their parents’ divorce. It combines practical wisdom along with validation for the challenges people face. Highly recommend!”

Dr. Julia Sadusky, PsyD, Author

“I purchased this book to prepare for a youth group evening on divorced parents. As an adult child of divorce, I have been looking for answers to these questions for many years! The answers are concise, clear, and uplifting. Although it doesn't cover every possible topic, I can't think of a question it didn't answer. Thank you.”

Anonymous

“If you've never considered how your parents' divorce may be affecting your relationships, your jobs, your mental health and your confidence, take a look. It's not your fault that you are suffering. Divorce is more devastating than we were ever led to believe, but this comprehensive book will enlighten you. You will be sure to identify with many of the issues discussed.

This is a smart, practical guide that gives us hope for our future and makes us feel that we aren't alone. This is a necessary book for all children of divorce. I spent many years of my life wondering what was wrong with me? Pontarelli seeks to tell us what is wrong with divorce, and how we can use the tools he offers to life a better life.”

Anonymous

“Joey and his team at Restored have worked tirelessly to develop a resource that reminds individuals lost in the effects of a broken home that they are not alone, that--as the title clearly states--the experience is not their fault, and--perhaps most importantly--there is hope. Joey draws on not only his own testimony from his parents' divorce but incorporates the experiences of countless others from similar situations he and Restored have engaged with. In tandem with the wisdom of other experts, this comes together in the form of topical advice and practical tips.

This book can be read cover-to-cover or referenced for one of the many issues it addresses surrounding the divorce/separation of one's parents and life thereafter. As a fellow child of divorce in my thirties, I benefited greatly from this book and wish something like it might have existed when I was in high school. To that end, I have shared copies of this book with several of the students at the high school where I teach dealing with the breakdown of their families. The reception has been tremendously positive, and this book has set in motion a number of inspiring conversations.

If you (or someone you love) come from a broken home and are looking for some sort of light toward navigating the challenges that brings, I cannot recommend this book enough, and I am deeply grateful to Joey and Restored for bringing a voice into that wound of silence!”

John McLain